Forever Lost
by InuyashasFieryInuyashasyokai
Summary: Throughout life a piece of our hearts are freely given to those we choose to possess it.Is there ever a time when too much of it is parted away with nothing in return to keep it warm,sheild it enough to ensure it's next beat,or become's cold with darkness
1. Chapter 1

Forever Lost

~ Chapter One ~

Downward Spiral

By Inuyashas Youkai

' Throughout life a piece of our hearts are freely given to those we choose to possess it .Is there ever a time when too much of it is parted away with nothing in return to keep it warm ,and sheild it enough to ensure it's next beat ,or become's cold with darkness to where there's nothing left ..'

Frozen in time , those images splayed in front of those twin , teary chocolate hued , orbs of light. As the scene held her captive , stilled by the painstakenly wretched heartache, and trapping her to continue to see the truth with her own two eyes. Tears collected within them but never fell for the fault was truly hers forever thinking otherwise. Those words spoken by the soft ways of the normally irritable hanyou, one's only she could dream was meant for her but with the exception of the few times when due to injury , or his human night, never were those words ever bestowed on her. Now she new why , and she knew the truth with nothing to sugar coat it ..Inuyasha had chosen her.

" Kikyo , it's always been you ..I only want you...I never forgot you even for a second"

"W hat about my incarnation, Kagome?"

"I told you I only need her to help her locate the shards and for the final battle of Naraku"

"I could..."

"No ! I will not have you fight anymore , that's why I have Kagome . I will not have him hurt you anymore"

"So you will have Kagome fight a battle for a cause that wasn't her's in the first place in order to keep me safe? Does she know you are only keeping her her here to use her?"

"Look it can't be helped ..Nothing will happen to Kagome and she will be able to go back to her own time as you will be able to return to me .."

"Do you know Inuyasha without me passing on , because she is my incarnation , Kagome will not exist.."

Once the forced will of heart causing the innocent bystander to watch , and continued to be held still by a now unknown force , could presently feel her control of her legs to move , Kagome began to move. Quietly but quickly stepping through the underbrush to escape from everything reminding her of why the tightening of her chest convulsed painfully still. The girl left in a daze , never hearing the calls of her name to stop , nor the evil cackle's traveling forth behind her , and tinkling on deaf ears , as she ran passed..

" Kagome !"

"Kukukukukuku..."

Finally reaching the well , and without stopping the woman threw herself over the well , while in mid flight tossing the necklace to the ground ,before being caught by the blue tendrils of light that would bring her back for the last time, through the well to her time. Once on the other side , on a accord that wasn't her own , a burst of light exploded forth , and shattered against the well in flickers of thunderous power , thus sealing the well , before she fell unconscious. Darkness wrapped around her then , answering her submissive call to relinquish the ties that once bound her to the life she once knew, knowing that she would never remain the same..

~Devastation Awaits~

Five Hundred some years in the past , a human male thrown to his knees in front of the cherished well , one that brought one of his loved possessions to him, now gone. Kagome was now out of his reach to him now for the well was now sealed , and the worst part was the hanyou , now human because of the calling of a new moon night, didn't know why she left him. Kagome promised him that she would always stay with him, and for some reason now she was not .

For all he knew was he rushed to her after being roused from his spot in a nearby tree by the salt that was her's , and without stopping , Kagome jumped into the well for good. Never to return with the shikon jewel left behind ,torn from her neck with her flesh and blood in small increments still clinging on the simple cord ..Tears flowed from the darkened orbs of their natural amber hues, as the hanyou clung to her strong but slowly fading scent that was purely Kagome..

The funny thing was where he had found her at first before she ran was the exact place where the hanyou had met up with Kikyo earlier that night ..Running through what he and the dead priestess Kikyo, talked about once a thought occured to him.

' Could she have been there watching like she once had in the past..Was there anything I said that made her leave?'

~Memories with Kikyo~

"Kikyo.."

"Inuyasha .."

"I see you have chosen .."

"I have , but I never forgot you even for a second ,and I won't ever ..I will revenge your death , Kikyo but I want Kagome.. I love Kagome , but I will always love you Kikyo , even if I chose Kagome I will always remember you ..I only want your soul to rest in peace , as now you are dead , and there's no chance for us any longer ..Even if we do go to hell together it doesn't mean we will stay together when your soul will go to Kagome , and I will be once again alone.. I just can't do it Kikyo..I am sorry.."

"I figured as much that my incarnation would turn you against me , and make you leave me I should've killed her when I had the chance , stupid wretch!"

"Don't ever! She did no such thing , actually Kagome was the complete opposite Kikyo , only wanting my happiness, and accepting whatever that meant for me...Kagome loved me for who I am ,not for who I wasn't , and I will do the same for her even if she doesn't know the truth , or if that leaves me alone with her on the other side.I will wait for her until I met her again if the well rejects me , or she is taken back to her time , and then make her my mate. You even touch my intended in any way it won't ,matter how I once loved you because my demon side won't even hesitate in killing you fot taking away it's life mate ..For your safety and my sanity please don't , I don't want that fate for you , Kikyo.."

" Than this is goodbye Inuyasha , for that I cannot promise you ..From this moment on we are enemies hanyou for my hate within my soul cannot accept anything but my redemption , and to take back what it belives is mine..."

"I am sorry that it has to be that way but if that's the way you want it so be it.. Goodbye Kikyo.."

TBC...


	2. Chapter 2

Forever Lost

~ Chapter Two~

Separation

By Inuyashas Youkai

' I should've known for it was standing in front of me , my fate would be forever lost , shrouded in darkness..Forgotten and unwanted by no one but what forever haunts my soul..'

~ Memories Faded At The Well~

' Why Kagome ? Why did you leave me ..Were you there when I saw Kikyo? If you were than you should now everything I tried to hide from you...' The hanyou fretfully questioned anyone who would listen and who possessed the answer within his head , while his eyes began to flicker between colors

As the sun began to rise , the silver returned , bleeding back into his blackened mane , as his claws lenghtened , and his eyes grew amber but continued to war with the bloody crimson of his inner beast. Staring hatefully at the well that would no longer allow him to pass , and keeping him from his mate, as a voice began to flow within his ears to bred his growing hatred . Naraku.

"Kukukukuku ..Inuyasha so it has come that your choice to be with Kikyo has finally caused the impedient wench to flee aww too bad for you but for me it is fortunate ..I won't have the wench to interfere with what I desire , now nobody can stop me.."

"What are you talking about ya bastard , and what do you mean I never abandoned my mate for the dead wench ..

"Kukuku ...poor mutt ! Unfortunately that isn't what the wench saw , she saw what I wanted her to see, to get rid of her...

"You bastard , what did you do to my mate ! If you touched one hair on her head I will kill you!"

"Kukuku try it ! I dare you , without your wench you won't have a chance, and don't worry Inuyasha , I only broke her .. I broke her , then sent her where she belongs in her time , to live or to die but in the end that's her choice.."

"Hahaha That's all I need to hear you have done enough to ensure your death Naraku ! You pathetic life ends here and now!" Inuyasha , now with his demon took over seething with rage , and fear with what the bastard did to his mate might surely mean her death, with what images shown within the mirror positioned in front of him, as he rose above to attack the beast in front of him for taking what was his.

' Kagome... Please stay ...I am coming for you..'

_~ Naraku's Illusion~_

_ Awoken by a noise within the neraby trees , the girl held within his control walked to where Naraku was taking her , with her eyes glazed over within burning rage . Once Kagome was forced to stop her eyes landed on the scene in front of her, and her eyes unknowingly burned red bleeding through past the hurt. In front of her Inuyasha and Kikyo were settled within a loving embraced and attached by their hungry lips, passionately devouring the other this time.._

_ Voices bled into the visions ,intermixing within a blur of the sorrow , and the hatred breeding quickly within her, but not for them , for frozen by the emotions rushing forth , the woman was oblivious to everything around her ,and all else became blank with numbness. Kagome couldn't feel her clothes being torn from her body or the same one who took them slamming her against the tree, and violently raping her .._

_ Naraku repeatedly plunged into her , forcing himself into the lithe and almost dead soul laying limply beneath him. Kagome didn't scream nor did it seem that she even knew what was happening the only thing that she know , one thing everything was replaying itself within her mind and holding her in a possesive loop , was that she was unwanted by the one she wanted most ._

_ Once Naraku had his fill , he left her to live or to die , as long as she left , and so he placed a reaccuring nightmare into her mind with a tainted jewel shard .It was one of him abandoning her for Kikyo , and now he was out to kill her so her soul could return to his past love Kikyo ,bringing her to life. Standing , once the ritual was complete and the final betrayal was set into motion Naraku faded into the trees and watched his trechery that would would ensure his reign into countless generations. The destruction of the miko , Kagome , and in the end the rest who opposed him because the hanyou would hopefully go into a ragged bloodlust , killing them all without his lifemate._

_ It didn't take long before the girl in question woke, with the vision of Inuyasha's bloodlusting demon snarling some distance behind her ready to pouce, ready to kill._

_"Inuyasha ? What's wrong ? It's me , Kagome ...I was just going to say goodbye to everyone before I left you and leaving the jewel.."_

_"Hahaha , no you don't wench .I need your soul, Kagome .That's all I need from you , well and the jewel but your not leaving ,alive anyway!"_

_"I thought?.."_

_"Stupid wench ! No one wants you here ..Why would we ? I have Kikyo , I always wanted only her, you were just a replacement until I found a way to bring her back ..The others once I tell them of the betrayal of you siding with Naraku and becoming his mate they won't want you either.."_

_"What ,I never?"_

_"You smell , no you reek of his scent Kagome I smell through your lies, now prepare to die bitch!"_

_Ahhhh ! Noooo! " Kagome ran with hell's flame quickly chasing and burning at her heals until she was through the well, but without hearing the screams and the voices that would tell her of the hidden lies to decieve her to run away.._

~ Naraku and Inuyasha ~

"You bastard ! You took my mate , made her believe I would leave her than kill her for the dead wench ! If she dies I will bring you back to life just to kill you again!"

"Kukuku ..Would you like to see ? Before I kill you just with you loosing yourself to your demon side what is happening with your mate , I am connected still with her , due to a tainted jewel shard I placed within her before she left.."Naraku taunted before showing him more lies to bring him over the edge to for sure ensure of him loosing himself to his inner beast..

_~ Deception~_

_ Kagome was still at the bottom of the well surrounded by her own blood , with her once lively chocolate eyes now blank with nothing staring back at you. She was thrown on her stomach with her hands contorted as though she fell to the ground while the blood continued to pour itself out, from some unknown wound , and hidden from sight. There was nothing but silence .. NO sounds of pain, no lingering gasps of breath , no poundings of a heartbeat , and no existing remains of her scent but old spilt blood. Kagome's blood._

' Kagome , no not you ,mate ..Don't be dead ..please anything but that! I need you haven't you realized that wench I love you ,my crazy bitch!

TBC...


	3. Chapter 3

Forever Lost

~ Chapter Three~

Fighting Amongst Sides Just To Reach You

By Inuyashas Youkai

~ Brother's Plead ~

A older amber gaze stretched upon the horizon to search out a demonic presence that was simular to his half relative sibling , Inuyasha. The reasons to his search was because of the presence being overcome with that of a purebred demon instead of one a half breed would possess. Once he had come to the location where the scent saturated the area with his own blood, his theory was confirmed when he saw with his own awed gaze of his brother currently facing off Naraku . The stoic demon swiftly knocked that of his brother out of the way to gain his own vengence from the beast without his brother's interference.

Although , once he had Inuyasha had turned on him with his own fury but this time one could feel the pure demonic presence rolling off his brother in waves , without extended senses for it was too strong, and he submitted to his brother , allowing him to join , because his glare spoke of bloodlusting rampaged death. This new version of his brother , Sesshomeru had never seen before today , although had seen him transform before , but never like this.

Sesshomeru found himself reluctantly awed , and even more so when Inuyasha furthered into himself being consumed by his own rage once they together found that the Naraku that was destroyed by their hands was a fake. Inuyasha stuck a bout of fear within the older demon sibling , once after tearing everything living within his sight after the puppet disappeared , and then made to strode his way threatingly to his general direction.

"Inuyasha , what's the meaning of this? What has warranted this change?"

"Mate ! Bastard took mate , he killed her. Mate dying and I can't reach her! He must die!"

"Kikyo? But this Sesshomeru thought she was already dead? I don't understand?"

" Noooo! You stupid mongrel and you call yourself a lord ! "

"You don't mean the other miko who's needed at the final battle do you?"

"Yes , Kagome ..Mate ...Dead ...She's dying without me Sesshomeru .. Alone..She died believing it was me who killed her but it wasn't it was Naraku ,just like the last time! I can't reach her anymore ,hell I can't even feel or smell mate anymore!"

"Naraku must die , and everything else will follow it as I pass it ..I can't control it so please kill me before I tear all that is living apart Sesshomeru , and this is my final request!"

"Lil brother listen to yourself , you are a power to be reckoned with . Don't embarrass father's legacy in asking what you plead , join me instead , and this Sesshomeru in return will look into the retrieval of your mate..."

" How are you going to do that , nobody can pass thru the well now without the jewel letting us pass, and now it's rejecting me to get through"

"Have you ever thought that maybe if what you say is true that the miko might've closed the well to ensure her death ?"

" I don't know..."

"Take this Sesshomeru where the miko would pass into this time lil brother"

"Fine ! Whatever!"

~ Falling Within The Present~

"Kagome ? Sis ? Is that you in there?" A young boy questioned once a loud thud slammed within the well and the odd purple smoke billowed from the well laced with a strong putrid scent of something reaking of a dead animal

~ No Answer~

The boy , that went by the name of Souta , slowly closed the distance to the well house doors to investigate with fear growing within his veins regarding what he would find once he got inside, but he continued. Once inside Souta hesitantly lowered his gaze towards the horrid sight of his magled sister within a puddle of her own blood . Trying to scream out gaspingly but finding that no sound came forth as the seemingly dark aura seemed to cling to her , and leave him shockingly frozen.

' What happened ?'

Slowly turning to run to get his mother to call for help before a voice lingered in the shadows from somewhere unknown wafting into his ears..

" Kagome...Stay Mate.. I am coming for you..."

Soon familarity reconized the voice as Inuyasha and Souta without a thought blurted out a quiet reply.

"Inuyasha what happened to my sister..Why is returned to us like this..?"

"Souta ?" Inuyasha 's voice whispered across the well house echoingly

"Yes .."

"How is she ..Is she dead?"

" I don't know doesn't look to good but I can't get to her there is a barrier around her blocking me from getting to her..I think she's dying Inuyasha but why? What happened?"

"No time , Go get help ! Don't let her die ,please! I will come for her as soon as I can Souta ! Now Go!"

Souta quickly ran for his mother and grandpa to ensure that they follow him back to his dying sister . Once his grandfather reached his grandaughter Kagome, surprisingly for once his preist powers worked in their favor , and the other two almost thought it was like someone working through him because he never possessed anything that worked the way it was supposed to. Not only that once he kneeled down to prey in front of the swirling colors of a nasty blend of putrid purple and light pink with a tinge of black portraying the barrier surrounding her, a forth stronger presence seemed to flood within the small area of the wellhouse.

As soon as the barrier dispersed from his granddaughter's ladden form , Souta began to locate the source of her blood loss to suture it while his mother was on the phone with a ambulance. Not long after a medical team showed and swarmed around the seemingly dead Kagome with their poking and proding , with the artificial jump start of her heart shaking it's way into her still body. After moments of prolonged silence the doctors on the scene had soon loaded her up on the truck to use some of there more advanced use of tools while on there way to the hospital .

After no signs were concluded with their efforts of reviving Kagome , as her soul kept falling within herself into unknown destinations, they attending paramedics declared her dead on the scene ,but couldn't make the final decision until the doctor made their final decision , and once they arrived ,but their findings were recorded:

Kagome Higarashi

O. A .

Cause of Death :

Rupture Of The Heart

Date / Time Of Death

Sept 13 , 2000 2:35 pm

Oblivious to what was happening other than her coming death of the obomination that she felt became of her , Kagome let herself go further and further into the abyss unknowingly as she fell with a strangers hand crushing within the place of her heart , leading the way into her darkened oblivion, by the starngers own creation..

TBC...


	4. Chapter 4

Forever Lost

~ Chapter Four ~

The Unexpected From A Familar Face Within A Distant Past

By Inuyashas Youkai

A tall man wearing a crisp white dress shirt with a black tie , and tan khaki's , accompanied by another gentleman dressed similarly except a red button up with black dress pants , and no tie , walked swiftly towards the room they were informed of withholding the girl they waited for. Both men wore ther long black mane's up in a low ponytail but still didn't restrict it's movement as it swayed with their bodies movements. As they passed the corridor to where the room they sought was both men were stopped as to why they were heading to a location where bodies were placed awaiting their last journey to the morgue, by a stout gentleman at the receptionist's desk.

"Ready lil brother?" One man silently whispered so only the other could possible hear with his supreme sensivity to sounds and smells

" Of course after all this time waiting I was born ready to take back what's mine" the other man returned

"Very well then let's get your mate , when I give you the go run.."

"Fine Bastard ! Lets just get this over with!"

"Now Yasha Run ! " Sesshomeru ran to the room after dumping a pot of coffee feined accidentaly on the desk clerk while pretending to pour himself some coffee , with his brother on his heals , and rushing towards where the girl was placed.

"Right behind ya Sessh" Inuyasha yelled while running to keep up

Once coming to where her faintly bearing scent still lingered in a room all by itself .Kagome laid there on a examining table motionless with many entrance wounds covering her body and the crude angle her body laid positioned on the table led them to believe that her spine was indeed broken, along with many protruding ribs breaking through her flesh in odd of this only seemed to fuel his anger for the man who killed his mate and one who seemed to disappear for a time afterwards. For Inuyasha and Sesshomeru had been centuries since they saw either the miko they were standing protectively over, and that of Naraku.

A blade emerged at Sesshomeru's side before the once stoic demon raised it above the girl's head , before he saw once again in a long time the death seekers fighting to drag her soul to the underworld, but there was something else a presence hovering over it as well.

"Naraku!"

"What ? "

" Naraku still has a hold over you wench .."

"Damn Bastard! Can you still revive her?"

"Yes I can but we can be sure that once I sever the ties between death and that of Naraku ,to bring her back , that he will once again show himself in this time.."

"So be it I been waiting for the cretin to show himself to pay for the shit he's done to my mate"

"Tenseiga!"

Once the blade cut through the ties that bound her a sort of peace resumed and replaced the torrent of vile presence that for a long time seemed ever since she was brought in to cling to her courpse. Momentarily many guards burst through the room alerting the brothers that they had to leave with the miko immediatly. With one fluid step , Inuyasha grasp ahold of his intended with a sigh while his brother Sesshomeru pushed through and Inuyasha following his brother until they reached their car awaiting outside, without interuption with their heightened speed. Soon they were inside , and alerting their hired driver to like a bat of hell take them home.

On the way , the hanyou , and the demon companion noticed the shallow breathing returning to her , following the faint pitter pat of her heartbeat.

" Kagome... Come back to me ..."

The hanyou's deepened voice with age rumbled into her ears begging her to return to his side. Slowly chocolate eyes unveiled themselves to the now unhidden ambers before her body flinched back with fear, and in result the hanyou in question holding the girl in the arms pulled her close..

"No Kagome , whatever you saw wasn't me ..I wouldn't do anything to hurt you and make you go away for so long .. I love you and god have I missed you ..I was so worried that I lost you Kagome.. Please I know all of this must be confusing and alot to take in but just rest then hear us out ..Everything , you will understand in time but just know nothing will happen to you ever again, my mate .." Inuyasha whispered into the crook of her neck , and was thankful when she relaxed into his embrace

"Inuyasha ... Why are you here? Why am I not ..?"

"I am here to get back what's mine , my mate , you , which I have something for the bastard who took you away from me and almost succeeded with..well you were dead but we brought you back ..I won't let you leave me Kagome, I love you too damn much to lose you..."

"Us?"

"Sesshomeru .."

"Oh you ,mean he used the Tenseiga..."

" Yes , we will talk more love but now sleep , you deserve that much , and so much more but for now rest sweetie.." Inuyasha returned then kissed her forehead reveling into her renewed scent with another sigh thankful that she was brought back where she belonged with him..

Although the girl held tightly within the arms of whom looked so much like her hanyou , once turned against her with his own claws so that Kikyo could live , tried to fight against his hold but couldn't for her exhaustion wouldn't allow her to ..So in the end Kagome succumed to the pull of sleep, while her confusion reigned within her mind. The hanyou smiled down at her behind her slowly closing eyes lids , and squeezed her closer to him , trying to calm his raging emotions , and to reliterate to himself that she was really with him.

" Kagome ..I meant what I said ..Things will be different this time ..Naraku won't have a second chance to do it again, and soon you will know the truth" Inuyasha affirmed while stroking her skull with his hands entertwining in her hair when something pricked him..

Taking a closer look , while his fingers grazed along the path where the spot where it once pricked him to find something that further maddened him. His nimble fingers pulled out a darkened shard of the shikon jewel, and it's presence placed within her by the vile monster , Naraku. Inuyasha could feel his blood begin to boil vengence against her attacker and one who told such lies to cause his mate to distrust or fear him.

The hanyou growled with menacing anger towards the one who dared to threaten his mate but was somewhat comforted him that at moment she was safe in his arms , and if it was up to him Kagome would stay that way. Kagome's inviting scent soon start to relax his rattled nerves and his snout settled in his favorite spot on with his cheek on her shoulder and hidden within her silky locks at her neck where her pulse point thudded , assuring him that she was still growls soon settled down to rumbling purrs to be comforting to the woman that was promised to be as his mate, at least in his beliefs.

Inuyasha fiddled with it for a short moment before he tossed the shard in, within a container separated from the others then carelessly threw them away from his mate before snugling her close to sheild her away from anything that could pose a threat to her ..

'Mine'

TBC...


	5. Chapter 5

Forever Lost

~ Chapter Five ~

Torrent Of Rage , Gusts Of Fear

By Inuyashas Youkai

~ Darkening Illusions ~

After for so long it seemed , casted in chilling darkeness , as it stilled frozen willingly into unwanted limbo, a small flicker of a flame ignited , and providing a warth within that of the deceived, whom never thought of such , could ever wish to exist once again. Feeling it cling to her in growing increments , as it was felt almost searing in it's attempt to reawaken it , from it moment its grasp pulled amongst the image etched in ice , and yanking back to where it wished , taking the darkeness bred within along with it...

The weary spirit , condemned of all light , now shinking from the light it once held , as it faced from a eternity ago it seemed, from the lack thereof , and at present was staring at it once again, like it was somehow a foreign object when introduced to it , because that it was. Confused slightly , as to where it was , and what had caused for things to apppear changed..Then soon it felt as though as it were being pulled , tied to something , and yet held to a mysterious anchor . Feeling your being become taunt as the strings that once bound her to a life , long forgotten , begin to materialize from which they faded, and becoming apart of what you now stand to be... But what was that , for the lost soul couldn't quite grasp it's purpose , yet.

Faintly becoming screams , then came the voices , starting out as pained whispers , and soon finding the broken will within flinch back , as the roars filled with hatred consumed it's thoughts. For what was now being presented in front of the now emerging feminine soul , one was expectantly taking the form of times past, a time where she would've rather have left buried within the past. Though the one in charge , persistantly seeking her presence once more, and calling her to rise , would'nt have it, refused for her to remain where she now lie..

Becoming hesitant , wanting to shrink below , just so that when the one who was searching , for her they would never find , and hopefully in the end would give up a needless task :To bring her back to the path in her past existance, and one she no longer wanted. Especially when she started to hear them , a voice , many in fact , and in it grew the only reminders as to why she should'nt, why if she could help whatever it was wouldn't find find her , bringing her back.

Though, throughout the short time in passing she unfortunately found the truth for that which was that she already was, and with that knowledge came fear , then understanding that it was because she was discovered in her hiding place, was the reason she felt this way. As to the reason her soul was reawakened in the first place, but who ... Who would have sought her out, to be once again be forced to linger in that path...Suffer in it ... And Why would they do such a thing?

Deciding to listen intently to what the voices were saying , what they were incessantly trying to tell her, and in that maybe finding that which she had felt was needed to be known for the right was hers. At first the sounds being made were nothing but a blurred typhoon , as they seemed to congeal together with no apparent begining , nor end to it constant noise , only it seemed rather that they were peaceful , safe. Then , as they fought to become clear , while she tried with her might to find against the pull of her soul , as it became unrelenting in its will to drag her to it's unknown desired destination, the sounds became distinct words.

" Can I stay Inuyasha..."

_Who is Inuyasha .. Somehow I know that name .. It feels so... Familar to me , but why? _

"Haven't you figured it out yet , wench ! That I need you here by my side !"

_That voice ... I know that voice .. Could it be that he's this Inuyasha person.._

" I though maybe it would be better off if I was gone ..."

_Is that me .. Did I say that ? I think it was .. But why did I say that.. Was it because of him?_

" Kagome , I'am sorry .. I 've decided to stay with Kikyo .."

_If I was Kagome, and he was Inuyasha .. Who was Kikyo , and why if he needed me , did he want to leave me alone, in the end..._

Then the pain , as realization fell upon her , broke free, and her memories from times past, remembered.. The images crashed its tidalwave upon her once again , and as it had , the words rushed to join them of what led to her demise..

_" Kikyo , it's always been you ..I only want you...I never forgot you even for a second"_

_"W hat about my incarnation, Kagome?"_

_"I told you I only need her to help her locate the shards and for the final battle of Naraku"_

_"I could..."_

_"No ! I will not have you fight anymore , that's why I have Kagome . I will not have him hurt you anymore"_

_"So you will have Kagome fight a battle for a cause that wasn't her's in the first place in order to keep me safe? Does she know you are only keeping her her here to use her?"_

_"Look it can't be helped ..Nothing will happen to Kagome and she will be able to go back to her own time as you will be able to return to me .."_

_"Do you know Inuyasha without me passing on , because she is my incarnation , Kagome will not exist.."_

I rememeber now , he didn't need me .. He only used me until Inuyasha was able to possess a way for him to bring back of which was his past love , and she was just someone to fill the space until he had it , then afterward threw her away..

_"Kukukukukuku.."_

Thrown Away , Then handed over to the ill fate of being taken .. Torn to pieces as he saw fit by , that of the purposely forgotten hands of which were to befall her.. Within her unconscious she knew, but within her mind only knew the fear of what the beast of long ago , hovering over her , had desired , and only wished with a vile intent to destroy her , break her apart so that she could never be oneself again..

Naraku .. Now, that was true ,she knew , and he had done what he sought to accomplish.. Naraku destroyed her , but not before Inuyasha had come to break her first... It was wanted for her to die...

" But Why .. What had I done ..."

I existed ... That's why .. If only I hadn't come to be, as I was, in the first place then none of this would've happened .. Then where would I be , and why after I am gone would one wish to bring me back from the ashes .. If my sole pupose , and intent was merely to be brought to exist , only to die, accpeting my death...

I have accepted it though .. I never should have been ... I know that now .. But then Who, and Why..?

This soul that was once the entity known as Kagome , soon saw the visions, even turning darker as she continued to watch , like so many times before , defeatedly giving up the will to stand against them ,for at this point and time , she no longer had it anymore.. She was no longer in any form fitting into what was once the girl known as Kagome, for she was gone...

_It didn't take long before the girl in question woke, with the vision of Inuyasha's bloodlusting demon snarling some distance behind her ready to pouce, ready to kill._

_"Inuyasha ? What's wrong ? It's me , Kagome ...I was just going to say goodbye to everyone before I left you and leaving the jewel.."_

_"Hahaha , no you don't wench .I need your soul, Kagome .That's all I need from you , well and the jewel but your not leaving ,alive anyway!"_

_"I thought?.."_

_"Stupid wench ! No one wants you here ..Why would we ? I have Kikyo , I always wanted only her, you were just a replacement until I found a way to bring her back ..The others once I tell them of the betrayal of you siding with Naraku and becoming his mate they won't want you either.."_

_"What ,I never?"_

_"You smell , no you reek of his scent Kagome I smell through your lies, now prepare to die bitch!"_

_Ahhhh ! Noooo! " Kagome ran with hell's flame quickly chasing and burning at her heals until she was through the well, but without hearing the screams and the voices that would tell her of the hidden lies to decieve her to run away.._

Whoever it was that now wished of her said return, would certainly be surprised to see what she now become , but maybe not , perhaps it was their intention to make her this way ..

TBC...


	6. Chapter 6

Forever Lost

~ Chapter Six~

On The Outside Looking In

By Inuyashas Youkai

~I don't own Inuyasha or the song Coming Your Way~

' Has my angel lost it's way , will it ever find it's way .. If all we have is love , then all I have is you .. If life is what we chose , my choice is you.. I coming your way ..If all is do is try , I give you all mine. If faith help us to decide, I have decided.. With all of my breath , from the heart in my chest, Every look in my eyes you'll know why .. I am coming your way ...'

Intently watching, as the hanyou mused after hearing the faint start of a new heartbeat , that the one he was so obsessively observing , was well on her way back to him. Observing through torn eyes , the distraut form who had once appeared as the one who's hand had sought to break her , became defeatedly curious to what her soul was thinking know, but deep down somehow he already knew. It was shown with the start of the unexpected new breath taken with shock to it's reawakening , and he also knew why..

When he was privy to what had been made to play out in front of his mate's eyes created the flames of fury to combust, flailing itself out in eratic movements , but it also brought about the storms brewing within himself in sorrow , for what had occured , and in truth , sadly, when she did in fact come back to him , the weakened soul would think that it only presented a reunion with her creator. The one who helped make her the way she would appear to him now , as the time had come for her to be awoken . The hanyou wasn't as stupid as everyone thought he knew , he felt it shortly after the Tenseiga commanded her to life once more, and the soul that his mate carried resentment , despise for her creation, and everything meant for something she was not because as shattered as her soul was now , Kagome no longer knew any better.

To her , it was for all she ever grasped from her early demise her on earth, that she was a mistake , something that wasn't meant to be , and shouldn't have been brought to pass in the first place.. Her soul was broken , no longer being the one he so cared for , and loved , as now he wasn't sure if she ever could be , either. Although to the hanyou , once known as her mate , Inuyasha, well before she was taken from him , and destroyed , left for dead , without the chance or knowledge of it to save her, it didnt matter , because no matter what he would fight for her , love her as she should've been, like she would always be. For she was his , and the male wouldn't take otherwise , even if she along with hating herself , had grown to hate him to , in her long time without ..

A time without love , hope , happiness , nor light, this fate was what she now knew , and had known it for some time . It was the way she was torn from this world , away from him , with so many lies presented to her , while being shattered, and without nothing to fight for her , to show her otherwise. She wouldn't exist easily within the light , as she had so long before, because Kagome's soul, or what was twisted , distorted , created by those of the dark, so the transition in being forced to return wouldn't be that simple for either involved, and if he hadn't mistaken the aura that emerged with her rising , Inuyasha would guess that she feared him, even depised him for the fate that was handed to her..

Indeed the road in which he chose to take would be rough at best , even with the one's he still had alongside him , their pack. It took alot of time to carefully plan this , and to down to the last detail begin the makings of her return . Kagome's death wouldn't be permanent because he made it so , as it was decided long ago that without him she couldn't go , and without Naraku's hands rivaling against him, Kagome would still be with him, standing at his side. Many years had passed since then, now well within the time she was first brought into the world , and then tossed from the well's depths , after Naraku had his way with her, perish the thought using him as bait, left for dead , alone.

Sighing for the upteenth time since it had occured , waiting , just watching as her chest soon began to fill with air , and then be exhaled through her button nose , while his impatience was getting the better of him in the excitement of having her back , no matter what the result , Inuyasha wanted her back with him. Knowing that after his mate would recouperate would also gain the the traits borrowed from her mate ,returned, as she hadn't been able to have them develop, before she died. Saddened , if only it would have beack then, it would've stopped it because no matter in what form he was in on that night, Kagome would've been able to show him , as to what was happening , giving him the chance to save her in telling her that what she knew was wrong, and Inuyasha was waiting for her, like he still was.

" Kagome...Come back to me .. I need you back , no matter what that bastard did to you , to make what you are now forced to be .. I love you still, as I had then , and I 'am so fucking sorry that I wasn't able to stop it , mate .. Please say you'll stay , let me make you see.."

After a whine emerged from inside his chest , as to the devouring dejection in the soul that was plainly finding the body she now was again made to be placed in. Within the slowly healing body she was forced to inhabit , the hanyou could feel the spirit shudder against itself , as it continued to fill the body's shape , as it was laid still upon the soft bed next to him , inside his room, and with the comforting warmth cocooned around her with the soft coverlet. Seeing her tired eyelids flutter, as they moved , only to see if it still could , and seemed to sigh against itself to the small success it had accomplished .

Hours had passed , and still now signs to show that his Kagome would wake soon , or maybe that was what she wanted for the fight she pursued inside to allow the want , for her not to come, but the hanyou would only fight harder . This would be the only time he would fight her when his mate would desire to give up the fight to live , and with the love he had for her the hanyou did because of what she did for him , Kagome wouldn't have let him do so when he wanted to either. So why should she be able to give up so easily , especially even if she knew it or not , there were people waiting for her, and those whom loved her so..

Hearing a shuffling from over where she was placed upon the bed , and encouraging the hanyou to look at her form , then catching those chocolate ,eyes swirled with blood , as she started at him with her lifeless uncaring eyes, one that no matter what they were, they were missed , and loved undoubtedly so..

' I've been here before , and now where I am again ..standing at the door preying you'll let me back in .. Only Scratching the surface of where I known to be ..Turn me around , pick me from what I have become ...Bring me back to where I need to be .. I need you.. I can't do this myself ..Your the only one who can undo what I 've become .. Forgive me for what I've now known to be '

"Kagome..."

As soon as that name was passed through the lips of the one, now in front of her eyes ,kneeling down , and suddenly flinching back as those haunting amber eyes became clear .. She now knew the one who would curse her with this life again , being tortured with the pain she was stuck with , and now that she knew , Kagome found herself not to be surprised .. For this she should've known that it would've been none other than that of her creator , one of them anyway, because nobody else would willingly bring the hell that her soul promised , upon revival, with the exception , that of the hanyou , Inuyasha ..

TBC...


	7. Chapter 7

Forever Lost

~ Chapter Seven ~

Blowing Smoke , Emerging From Hell's Flame

Meeting Her Creator

By Inuyashas Youkai

~ I Don't own Inuyasha nor the lyrics from Here Without You By Three Doors Down, or of Down With The Sickness By Disturbed ~

_ As soon as that name was passed through the lips of the one, now in front of her eyes ,kneeling down , and suddenly flinching back as those haunting amber eyes became clear .. She now knew the one who would curse her with this life again , being tortured with the pain she was stuck with , and now that she knew , Kagome found herself not to be surprised .. For this she should've known that it would've been none other than that of her creator , one of them anyway, because nobody else would willingly bring the hell that her soul promised , upon revival, with the exception , that of the hanyou , Inuyasha .. _

_A hundred days made me older since the last time that I saw your pretty face ..A thousand lives had made me colder and I don't think I can look at this to say ..With all the miles that separate , its so dear now when I 'am reeling of your face.. I here without you baby ..but you still on my lonely mind .. I think about all the time .. In my dreams I'am with you all the time ..I 'am here without you baby , but in my dreams your with me all the time , and tonight girl It's only you and me..._

_"Kagome..." _

" Inu Yasha ... Why did you bring me back to this hell Inuyasha ! " Kagome screamed then pinned a hated glare upon the one who made her who she wasn't

" Because .. I brought you back to me because I needed you back then , I still do ..I "

"Enough lies Inuyasha , you don't have to lie to me any more , not when I seen it with my own eyes ...You only wanted me for the jewel , and that for my soul , so that you can bring back your precsious Kikyo .. So what I want to know now is why, when you have your mate do you wish for me to return , as a copy to the original !"

" Kagome Dammit! You are going to listen to me , and good too.. Because what I say now I will only say once wench! " Inuyasha sneered in frustration of the hell that was already set in motions by the actions of time passed , and his mate had to endure endless time with only the knowledge that was set out for her, as he now held his mates hands within his clawed fingertips..

Lies ...

_' Can you feel that , Oh shit ..._

_Drowning deep in my sea of lonely _

_Broken are your servant I am _

_Its seems all thats left of my human side _

_It's slowly changing in me '_

"No First you will listen ! You wanted me back now you'll reap the benefits of knowing the seeds you now had sown . Do you know what fate had befallen me once you gave me to Naraku?"

_'Will you give it too me ?_

_For in your mind the reflection It suddenly_

_It changes , Violently it changes _

_There's no turning back now .._

_You've opened up the demon in me.._

"I didn't give you to no one Kagome ! I was there the whole time , waiting for you in the tree that night.. The only reason I woke was because I smelt your tears , and the next thing I knew is that you left me , without knowing why ,until Naraku taunted me with what he's done ..! Don't you see ! ? Look in my eyes and see what it is that I have lived with the knowledge that you died with the lies you had ! ?" Inuyasha screamed back in rage for what he was supposed to see, the twisted deception that had become known of the pure soul of his mate..

Looking into the eyes , the piercing glow of the moonlike orbs staring back at her, the one's she tried to ignore before, finding that she could not , while seeing the devatation within his orbs of amber , her mind so tormented with what she knew to be true severed any logic to enter her thoughts ..

_Enough come on get down with the sickness open up your hate , and give it up to me .._

"That isn't the fate I was shown Inuyasha ! Though what was I wish to show you , to let you see what fell upon me , the moment you left, walking away ..."

_I can see inside of you _

_The sickness is rising _

_Don't try to give up what you need .._

_Can you give it to me.._

" Kagome... listen to me , All of it was a trick to make you leave ! Dammit , none of what you saw happened ! Why won't you open your eyes and.." Inuyasha desperately whispered as her weak body crawled closer to him , so she could reach out with her trembling fingers , and touched the sides of his face , effectively cutting him off with his rant , in exchange for the images that were now plaguing him, and had not been known previously...

_It seems all that was good has died , _

At least known to be true...

After finding that Naraku had not only had distorted what happened, darkening her with his deceit , tormenting her with lies, the beast had destroyed her while he broke her physically .. Although this Inuyasha knew , but never in the way Naraku had actually done it..

For what he saw next was humblingly painful , to say the least in what his mate's poor broken soul had do endure, and then being trapped with the condemnation in the dark ,as her only friend , alone , with only her memories to comfort her...

TBC...


	8. Chapter 8

Forever Lost

~ Chapter Eight ~

Acquianted With Darkness, Gifted By The Tortured To

It's Halfbred Summoning

By Inuyashas Youkai

_When will this all be over _

_How come this never ends_

_This room keeps closing in on me_

_This pain all be over if I just blinked an eye_

_Washing The World Away_

_Washing The World Away~ Red_

Still , with her hands placed on either side upon his face , as with her help he was able to truely see. For it seemed that somehow she was lured away from the campsite that night after waking , then climbing down the tree the were in to use a nearby bush. It was after that she came back, and within her eyes caught the tell tale approach of Kikyo's Soul Collectors hovering up into the night sky. A burnt color rust like watermark fluidly emcompassing both eyes coated the sight taken within her chocolate orbs. Although it wasn't immediate , but subtly changing over a spanse of time where if no one was looking could it be noticed, as the hanyou now watching the events through her eyes , as if he were present , almost like a observers view , but in it actually as it was happening to him , himself , Inuyasha was experiancing it.

A flash of silver bluring with a bloodied undertone whisked its way across the forest within the trees , as if it was also following it ahead of her. The urge to follow the taunt , although even if deep down knowing in the direction it will lead once she had finally arrived to where she was being fed the lure from not far away. A slight pull from within herself was felt as if it was something was attempting to rip , as its strength grew stronger, almost tearing inside out . Still she kept going , walking towards the sight that she knew was waiting , and one that would cause her to shatter , but it didn't matter because she had to know. As she walked , whispers teased cruelly about the very thing that she now knew to be true , and that in it , it was realized that everything was a lie , while the feeling creeping up within her left her feeling betrayed.

Coming to discover the sight promised to find leaving her still , as the weight became heavy wrapping around her chest , and swaddled within a blanket. The new presence reaching in , and tightly tying itself within her darkening soul , whispering promises of deceit, encouraging the blackening expanse within her heart to grow. Telling her lies of betrayal, and with using the corrupt shard of the sacred jewel , as it was merged easily inside the flesh of her body .It was then that the image of Inuyasha leading Kikyo away knowing that their enemy Naraku had soon made his presence known to accept the vile the illusion of the reunited couple was formed , and disappearing shortly after their burden was thrown away within Kagome's eyes, the beast then moved in closer to finish of the destruction that the one before him had already begun.

Naraku...

The lost girl with her eyes gained ,as her master's posession to use like the monster greedily desired ,was then led away from the placed somplace dark within nothing of a flame in sight , held tauntly against a smooth surface in the spot , and design for the bastards need in what was in his demented creation to do. The feeling of being watched from somewhere on the shadows was forming creepily within , far away , as her thoughts where currently lost , breeding from the shock , and pain from the knowledge of the begining of a end for her. Tears fell unknowingly from her eyes, uncontrolably becoming more prevalent, but without a accompaning sound. Proven with certainty of her doom was given merit upon hearing the only sound within the deadly stillness, which undoubtably came with the distinct noise of a evilly known cackle, taunting her.

~Trapped Witin The Passage Through Time ~

Somewhere within the darkness that a lost drone captive was kept, sparks of a withering violet hue appeared her and there sometime later awakening the deadening of a once pale chocolate , now dulled, as its anolmoly gave light to someone other then the forgotten to care. The blueish hue hinted that where-ever that she was held was made with a prior grey stone held within a circular frame, now splattered with blood. A rising tingle lifted inside ones throat , only to linger there until the urge to cough away its obstruction clogging it , and it was when the one possessing the afliction did just that , only more of the vital life fluids did force its way out , gushing forth towards a unknown , as unexpected smooth, cold surface. Pain rose , shuddering around its flexed form , contorting around like a vile , but clingy blanket , urging the one silent up till now to her forced slumber.

Attempting to move , but sharp throbbing pain violently shot up her stilled form, forced her body not being able to move .With the exception of her exhausted dying eyes wearily took in the diming sight from wihin those same orbs, as the knowing blackening began to form around the rim's , and random spots seemed to join in taking over in its efforts to block all else out. Ghostly images sired by its accompaning grusome sounds shrillingly , constantly reminding of the horrid turn of existance past , and leaving her body , mind , and soul completely , utterly violated,broken. Whisper's taunting her instilling the inbred notions that nothing held dear was no longer sacred , no matter how much one portrays differently.

Darkness consumed the pure light struggling to survive within the beaten soul , only longing for death . Spiteful chants of something said before, and repeated constantly to mock her in the mistake of ever considering anything other than the dire expected possibility of a deceptions first born.

"You see , the only purpose you possess is a substitute copy , for the original divine of the shikon no tama, a mistake . The existance you held was something that was never supposed to be . Don't you feel angry , jealous , sad even , that Kikyo will persevere happily with Inuyasha , and that because you don't belong here , all you can expect to achieve is whats left behind , like you. Saddness , pain, betrayal, hatred , rejection, and everything else exuming darkness is all that you will ever hope to grasp in your pathetic copied mockery of a original creation. "

And it's responding result was created.

"Yes , I feel all these things , and despise its cause equally; Kikyo , Inuyasha , tho most of all , I loathe myself, to be erased from the flow of time , because then none of this would've come to pass, and I would be nothing , as I am now ,but a long , lost memory of what could ."

TBC...


End file.
